I am chronically online: Whether it’s because of my job (online shopping rules) or an addiction to being up to date on pretty much everything, I’m staring at a screen approximately 75% of the day. (My eyes are begging me right now to take a break from the LEDs as I’m writing this.) But alas, my job dictates that I must inform you all of what gear is worth your hard-earned cash, and in this case, it’s a pair of eye massagers from one of the best recovery brands in the game right now, Therabody. In the brand’s endless pursuit to make your life better, it’s released the second-generation Therabody SmartGoggles, which actually pull triple duty by massaging, heating, and vibrating all around your eye and temple area. Also, it’s $200.
So, who the hell needs $200 blinders that also happen to buzz, buzz, buzz around your peepers? If Therabody’s to be believed, it’s anyone who suffers from tension headaches, eye fatigue, or generally wants an excuse to conk out for 15 minutes in pure darkness for a little R&R. I strapped into these $200 blinders, set aside a few minutes each day, and found out whether or not the Therabody SmartGoggles were worth the price.
- Battery Life: 180 minutes
- Material: PVC, polyester, nylon
- Weight: 13.7 ounces
- Warranty: One year
What Do They Do?
Aside from making it look as if I were doing a sci-fi remake of Jeff Goldblum’s The Fly, the SmartGoggles were designed to scientifically “reduce stress, enhance relaxation, increase deep sleep and improve overall sleep quality,” according to Therabody. How? With three settings—SmartRelax, Headache and Eye Strain, and Sleep Prep—which use different combinations of heat, vibration, and compression massages to address specific issues (easily distinguished by the name of the setting).
Now you’re filled in on what they do, but do they actually achieve what the brand set out to accomplish? Not to get too far ahead of ourselves, but the SmartGoggles do, in fact, perform their duties as promised: They compress, vibrate, and heat. But does any of that actually do something for your overall wellbeing? Well, that depends.
Eyes Wide Shut
The first thing you’ll notice once you’ve strapped into the SmartGoggles is how well they block out pretty much all light. It’s actually pretty jarring to be submerged in pure darkness, and when I first put them on, my eyes felt like they wanted to thank me for giving them a break from looking at my computer (or laptop, or TV, or any other backlit screen). No matter where I turned my eyes to look, I was fully, ahem, in the dark. And that was the problem with my first time trying these: I couldn’t see anything and I was standing, so I needed to take a peek to figure out where the hell I should sit down. All of the controls are at the top of the goggles, with a biometric sensor that reads your pulse from your cheek so that it can adjust the device’s vibrations based on your heart rate.
